Chris Borrelli is an edge case.

Yesterday, Chris wrote a super large article in the Chicago Tribune about being recognized at restaurants and being treated like a regular.  Unlike most people who crave some sort of special attention in life, Chris seems to downright hate it.

The article, more than anything, elucidates some of the awkward ways restaurants approached his regularity. New waitress telling him and his girl what they were going to order, a hostess spouting out that he had been at the restaurant twice before -- to no apparent end. This all apparently gleaned from computer-tracking. 

Chris seemed to lament the days of old when being a regular was more about being plain-old folksy than marketing.

Only I seemed to remember the days of old quiet well, in The Days Before Computers, when I was a waitress at a diner and had plenty of regulars. And I can assure you, that folksy showing up with the orange juice just as Mr. O.Jerk was parking himself at the stool was all about marketing -- because it was all about tips.

To me, I think the biggest difference is that in the past, being a great server was about using your Emotional Intelligence to read a table. If you had regulars, you watched their patterns and slowly, over time, began to anticipate their actions. It all came together slowly and in human time.

Today, with the advent of technology, that learning curve is compressed. And it seems restaurants are going through a little awkward teenager phase now that they are getting a handle on data collection.  But it doesn't mean that the technology should be thrown out with the bathwater, because really, restaurants are in business and dealing with customers is about marketing.

So, what's the real learning here? Customer data is something you use to inform the guest experience, not something to show off.

Just sharing that you know Chris has been at the restaurant twice is a pretty selfish act, if you think about it. That hostess wasn't trying to improve his experience, she was just flexing her muscles and hoping Chris would be impressed.  And really, why should he? She had done nothing except show off some rudimentary data collection that had no purpose.

But if that customer data shows that he liked the window table and during pre-shift and that hostess had done her review, she could just go a head and silently sit him at that table. Magically, Chris will feel great about the place and probably not even know why (and really he doesn't have to know why, he just has to feel good).

As for the robot new girl who spouted out his order before even handing him a menu. Frankly, I woulda done the same thing as Chris, which was to order something else just to spite her. So small minded, I know, and he seemed to know, but there is a bit of bizarre-o big brother in that scenario as he laid it out.

The smart move is to remember how he likes his French Toast cooked, no matter who is working the shift, or remembering to bring the milk skim the time he forgets to clarify.

Technology, after all, isn't something to fear, it is something to use. It doesn't have to be a tyranny in our lives, it can be a tool to make it all a little less hard. Because I am sure if the establishments Chris frequented used it with some subtly and generosity rather than as a trophy to show off, Chris would silently marvel at how comfortable and content he was at those places. He wouldn't notice, it would just be.

Again, we revisit hospitality.  And the idea that hospitality isn't about you, it's about the guest.

Calculating? Sure. But I'll tell you, with this kind of approach to marketing, I was even able to soften up Mr. O.Jerk back in the day.